Funny sports sayings: 53 funny sayings for sports fans

Are you looking for funny sayings from the world of sport? We are delighted to present you with the funniest sports sayings in this article.

spized | Trivia

May 28, 2024 |

Whats’ on this page

1. Funny sayings from the world of sports

2. Funny sayings from football

3. Funny sayings in sports – individual sports

4. Funny sayings on your fun jersey

Funny sayings from the world of sports

Athletes, coaches, and managers have often come up with funny sayings in the past. Across various sports, there have been numerous moments in press conferences or interviews that brought a smile to our faces. Especially when athletes are very frustrated due to a defeat or euphoric because of a victory, they sometimes tend to forget that the cameras are on. From these incautious moments, legendary quotes have emerged that the sports world will never forget. In the following sections, we present you with the funniest sayings from athletes. Get ready for a little laughter workout and enjoy reading.

Funny sayings from team sports

Team sports like basketball, handball, or ice hockey are characterized by a strong team spirit. Players often go straight to interviews after the game to answer questions from the media. A special euphoria or frustration often contributes to the occasional off-the-cuff remark. Whether intentional or unintentional, the sayings y.Team sports like basketball, handball, or ice hockey are characterized by a strong team spirit. Players often go straight to interviews after the game to answer questions from the media. A special euphoria or frustration often contributes to the occasional off-the-cuff remark. Whether intentional or unintentional, the sayings from team sports are undoubtedly funny.

"My team is so intelligent, they can easily have a dumb coach." - Vlado Stenzel (former handball coach)

"Most players skate to where the puck is. I skate to where the puck is going to be." - Wayne Gretzky (former ice hockey pro)

"The downside of handball is that as a spectator, you don't have time to grab a beer during the game. Too much happens, and that's a problem for Germans, of course. You can't make it to the fridge in time." - Stefan Kretzschmar (former handball pro)

"And then there are the usual things: bruises, hematomas, sprains, clean finger fractures that are splinted, muscle fiber tears - but those are not injuries that your coach will accept as such." - Stefan Kretzschmar (former handball pro)

"The only important statistic is the final score." - Bill Russell (former basketball pro)

"If every basketball player worked as hard as I do, I would be out of a job." - Steve Nash (former Canadian basketball pro)

"I always laugh when people ask me about rebounding techniques. I have a technique called 'just get the damn ball'." - Charles Barkley (former basketball pro)

"The only difference between a good shot and a bad shot is if it goes in or not." - Charles Barkley

"One of the best techniques when playing against Kareem Abdul-Jabbar - just give him the ball." - Earvin "Magic" Johnson (former basketball pro)

"I will be the old Shaq again. Last year I was ordinary, I was an earthling. I need to get back to my alien roots." - Shaquille O'Neal (former basketball pro)

"That I only hit 40 percent from the free-throw line is God's way of saying nobody's perfect." - Shaquille O'Neal

"They say nobody's perfect. Then they say practice makes perfect. I wish they would make up their minds." - Wilt Chamberlain (former basketball pro)

Funny sayings from football

Football professionals, in particular, are known for funny quotes that usually originated immediately after the game in live interviews. Andreas Möller, Mario Basler, and Lothar Matthäus, in particular, are known for witty sayings that are still well-known to all football fans today. Nowadays, we rarely get to enjoy funny statements from football in interviews – media training and a generally more cautious attitude due to greater reach have ensured that football professionals express themselves more thoughtfully. All the more delightful that all the old funny quotes are archived on the World Wide Web. Enjoy reading the funniest sayings from football.

"My problem is that I am always very self-critical, even towards myself." - Andreas Möller (former football pro, among others, FC Schalke 04)

"It was a beautiful moment when the national coach said: 'Come on, Steffen, take off your clothes, it's time to go!'" - Steffen Freund (former football pro, among others, Borussia Dortmund)

"I always said, I don't care who plays, as long as I play." - Mario Basler (former football pro, among others, FC Bayern Munich)

"Youth academies didn't even exist back then. If they had locked me up in one, I would have broken out – day and night." - Mario Basler

"People still have the same image of me as 30 years ago: He smokes, he drinks, and so on. People don't know that I drank the least beer of all. But I let them have that feeling, even though I only drink wine or vodka-lemon." - Mario Basler

"Sex before a game? My players can do as they please. Just not during halftime, nothing goes then." - Berti Vogts (former coach of the German national team)

"We are 50 percent in the quarter-finals, but that's far from halfway there!" - Rudi Völler (team manager of Germany at the 2002 World Cup)

"It's important to think about the next game with full concentration for ninety minutes." - Lothar Matthäus (Germany's record national player)

"I don't know if Magath would have saved the Titanic. But all the survivors would have been very fit." - Jan-Age Fjörtoft (after Eintracht Frankfurt's extraordinary relegation survival)

"This time he can take a bike. Maybe he'll have the necessary fitness when he arrives." - Coach Thomas Schaaf about striker Ailton, who once again missed the start of training camp

"I played my first international match in South Africa. It was an impressive encounter shaking hands with Nelson Mandela, but when he said I looked like Steffi Graf, I was a bit shocked." - Marco Bode, about his first international match for the German national team

"Football is a simple game; 22 men chase a ball for 90 minutes, and in the end, the Germans win." - Gary Lineker (former English football pro)

"The ball is round, the game lasts ninety minutes, and everything else is just theory." - Josef "Sepp" Herberger (former national coach)

"Two chances, one goal - I call that one hundred percent chance utilization." - Roland Wohlfarth (former football pro, among others, FC Bayern Munich)

"Football is like chess – only without dice." - Lukas Podolski (football pro, among others, 1. FC Köln)

Funny sayings in sports – individual sports

Individual athletes are on their own and are judged solely on their personal performances. In a cycling race, the person who finishes fifth was slower than four other competitors. The good or bad performances are solely to be analyzed by oneself. This is what makes individual sports so exciting. The required self-confidence and necessary self-discipline cause enormous psychological pressure that one must counteract. This can lead individual athletes to (consciously) overshoot the mark. The result is often rash, overconfident, and funny sayings that stick in the minds of fans.

"I don't always know what I'm talking about, but I know I'm right." - Muhammad Ali

"Kids love me because they probably realize quickly that I am mentally on their level." - Andy Roddick (former American tennis player)

"Here is the start, there is the finish. Between that, you have to run." - Emil Zátopek (former Czech athlete)

"A cyclist must take better care of his butt than his face." - Rudi Altig (former cycling pro)

"Ride as much or as little, as long or as short as you feel. But ride." - Eddy Merckx (former cycling pro)

"Rib fractures are overrated." - Jens Voigt (former cycling pro)

"When my legs hurt, I say: 'Shut up legs!' You do what I tell you!" - Jens Voigt

"Cycling is like going to church – many attend, but few understand." - Jim Burlant (former cycling pro)

"I thought the faster I pedal, the sooner I can retire." - Lance Armstrong (former cycling pro)

"Why didn't I become a surfer?" - Erik Zabel (former cycling pro)

"I still buy my toilet paper myself." - Discus thrower Robert Harting on whether anything has changed since his World Championship title

"If 100 white men chased a black man in the past, it was called the Ku Klux Klan. Today it's called golf." - Tiger Woods (former golf pro)

"To all my critics: Thank you, you have motivated me." - Usain Bolt (multiple Olympic champion)

"The Japanese are so friendly, it can't be healthy." - Linda Züblin (Swiss heptathlete at the World Championships in Osaka)

"Sometimes I already feel like I'm 40. Tennis years count like dog years." - Boris Becker (former tennis pro)

"The players at the top are simply on a different level than the players below." - Alexander Zverev (tennis pro)

Funny sayings on your fun jersey

Do you have a running group, enjoy playing football, or like cycling together? If your group wants to have a specific motto and you don't take performance too seriously anymore, you’re in the right place! Choose a funny saying for your jersey, attract positive attention, and strengthen your team spirit. Here are some humorous ideas for you.

"I don't sweat. It's glitter! :)" (Author unknown)

"Alexa, do the exercise for me!" (Author unknown)

"I consciously avoid the gym. I don't want to look like I can help anyone move." (Author unknown)

"No mercy for the calf." (Author unknown)

"He who brakes later is fast for longer." (Author unknown)

"Headwind builds character." (Author unknown)

"If you need to pee, you haven't sweated enough." (Author unknown)

"Hurry up, the beer is getting warm!" (Author unknown)

"Remember, you paid for this!" - Every kilometre is worth money. (Author unknown)

"The coffee is brewing; that's as sporty as I'll get today." (Author unknown)

Is your funny saying for the fun jersey not here? How about designing your own sports jersey with your favourite saying? At spized, you can design your favourite jersey yourself!